What the %#!!@# Do I Do with Cauliflower?

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At this very second, I have 1/2 a head of cauliflower sitting in my fridge. I already made buffalo cauliflower with the first 1/2 (while I'm not going to fight that it tastes better than chicken wings, I will argue that it's the tastiest way to eat cauliflower). Now, in my moment of need, I turn to my many, many recipe bookmarks to see what clever cauliflower creations can capture my curiosity this time.

Note that there are no recipes for cauliflower "alfredo" on this list. I made it once. It tastes like gross cauliflower puree on pasta. Very vegetal, in a bad way. Also, no cauliflower rice. Cauliflower was not and will never be rice. It was not and will never be bread, either, or chicken, but at least those recipes have other flavors going on. Cauliflower becomes the vehicle for buffalo sauce or General Tso's sauce or copious amounts of caramelized cheese. That's delicious.